Catching My Breath

A free verse poem about dreams, love, darkness, and the pursuit of one’s self. Though it ends (now) on a dark note, I don’t believe this to be the end of the speaker’s adventure. Pursing one’s self takes time and is not always pleasant. Though I believe the poem to be unfinished, I am ready to share this piece as it stands. In the future, I will continue to add to the poem as I have done over the years to represent the speaker’s inner growth.

* This poem was updated on September 14, 2021. The original is published on Ichabod Ebenezer’s blog.

With my eyes closed tight,

I see a world weaved in webs

Of creativity.

Giving my mind the freedom to fly,

I fly high above the realm of reality—

Leaving my body

To the earthly plane of

Ordinary days.

Stunned by a view

Unbelievable

To the most fantastic of fantasies,

My heart skips, my lungs tighten,

And my breath eludes me.

It taunts me.

It waves to me as it sails

Upon the crests of a clouded sky.

Feeling minutes pass as seconds,

I move with delighted haste.

For Time is far too precious to waste.

Hoping I may catch my breath,

I follow its glowing trail.

In circles and circles I chase the teasing tail.

Pausing, my breath ascends.

Glowing in a blissful show

It beams its sultry gift.

For the sake of Imagination,

I embrace the exhalation!

Inhale, exhale—

The flowing pair reunited.

Innocent ecstasy surges through my soul,

Liberating every undesirable vexation

Rousing every satisfying sensation!

And with a thought . . .

My heart falls fast,

Leaving my breath on the edge of my lips once again.

And there you were.

Your face illuminating with utopia,

Your lips only a whisper away from mine

And my breath dancing between

Our two wanting souls.

Time stands still.

Until your lips . . .

They touch mine,

Returning my absent breath with your taste—

A taste sweet with love.

Oh, Love . . . I surrender to you.

Your irresistible high

Feeds my heart’s beating frenzy—

Tantalizing my every craving

And filling my soul

With honeyed traces.

But once again, my breath becomes evasive—

Dropping fast below our tangled bodies,

And far beyond the bed of feathery clouds.

The deserter pulls me from your embrace,

For It and I

Are forever bound

In a tethering state.

Goodbye, Love.

I’ll remember you,

Always.

But this is not about you . . .

I continue to fall,

Seeing the ground approach

At a frightening speed.

And still my breath plunges forward.

I hold my eyes open,

Trusting my world created in Dream,

Trusting the pursuits of my

Fickle Familiar.

But cold air pierces my lungs,

And darkness envelops my world.

And now,

My eyes truly open.

Only to see the dark abyss

Of my reality.

Void of Light.

Void of Love.

Void of Everything

But me and my breath.

Inhale, exhale.